The three biggest barriers to successful coaching your employees are Me, Myself, and I. Once you get past those internal gatekeepers you become a much more effective coach, one who can help employees grow, develop, and reach new heights of performance.
Here are a three things those gatekeepers sometimes tell you, and why you should not listen to them.
1. "You hurt someone’s feelings when you tell them they're not doing a good job."
First of all, your gatekeeper has it wrong. You're not telling her what she is doing wrong, you're helping the employee do something better.
Second, you rarely hurt someone's feelings by giving feedback. We're all adults. Employees are fine hearing feedback as long as it is done respectfully in a way that they can hear.
2. "If you give him feedback he's going to get mad and that will affect the team."
Wrong, gatekeepers! Rarely does the person get mad, and if he does you talk it through with him. If he continues to act mad, then you tell him to stop it.
Here's what affects teamwork... not addressing an issue, or letting someone on the team consistently fall short of expectations. Remember this: Drama is unresolved conflict. Don't let issues fester and you won't have drama.
3. "Don't say anything now. Wait a few days and address it then."
I'm glad that gatekeeper is in management, not medicine! If you're bleeding, do you wait a few days to address the problem? Of course not. The sooner you address an issue, the sooner you are on the way to making things better.
The same is true with people. You rarely need to wait to give your staff feedback. Do you purposely wait days to praise someone? Of course not.
People want to be successful. They want to do a good job. The faster you give them feedback the faster they are on the way to doing just that.
So let me ask, are your internal gatekeepers getting in the way of you coaching your people to be even better?
How to use this article with your leadership team
Discuss as a group how internal gatekeepers can get in the way of successful coaching your employees. Have people share how these and other gatekeeper messages can impede their helping the staff be their best. Last but not least, ignore those gatekeeper messages!