I can hardly believe that last week I hit the big 5-0 on July 11th. Yes, I am officially eligible to be a card-carrying member of AARP.
It seems like just last week I got my first job in retail at the ripe young age of 16. It seems like just last week that I opened my store in Florida. It seems like just last week I met my wife in Boston. It seems like just last week I went to work for Bose in their new Retail Direct Group. It seems just like just last week that I adopted my daughter Kate, and then my daughter Jane. It seems just like just last week that I started Dynamic Experiences Group.
Then again, it seems just like last week I was 49. Oh wait, I was.
Overall, it has been a very good life. That's not to say I haven't had some challenging moments in my life but those times enable me to appreciate even more the wonderful people and opportunities that have come into my life. I'm a lucky guy.
So in honor of hitting the big 5-0, here is a list of 50 things I've learned so far. Some are about retail, some are about family, but all of them are about living life to it's fullest.
1. It's easier to give advice than take it. Usually the advice I give is also meant for me.
2. Having the answer isn't nearly as important as asking good questions.
3. Jobs, places, and things come and go. It's the people we meet that make life special.
4. It's my actions that define who I am, not who I say I am.
5. Learning to start my day over was one of the best things I ever learned.
6. Humility is the greatest trait I can have as a leader, partner, husband, friend, and father.
7. One of the worst things that can happen to me is to have no hope or dreams.
8. The next worst is to not act on those hopes and dreams.
9. The only person who can decide if I'm having a good day or bad day is me.
10. The more teachable I am the more I know. The more I know the more I can help others. The more I help others the better my life is, and that's why I remain teachable.
11. Work hard when it's time to work. Play hard when it's time to play. If you play when you're supposed to be working you'll have to work when you're supposed to be playing - and that is a bummer.
12. When you're a manager people have to do what you want them to do. When you're a leader people want to do what you'd like them to do.
13. Everyone makes mistakes but not everyone learns from them. The difference has a huge impact on the ability to have a happy and productive life.
14. The only person or thing that can hold me back is me.
15. We all need mentors in life. Do you have one? More important, are you one?
16. Your children won't remember much of what you said while they were growing up but they'll always remember how you said it. The same advice applies to people who work for you.
17. To be a good parent and a good manager I need to set high but appropriate expectations. It's even more important to hold the children or the employees accountable for meeting those expectations.
18. Most people are inherently good. I can't let the few who aren't impact how I feel and act towards the others.
19. Take care of your employees and they'll take care of the customers. Take care of the customers and they'll take care of the business.
20. In the same respect, neither your employees nor your customers will know you care unless you tell them. Tell them. Often.
21. You can't ask people to give service with a smile unless you've given them something to simile about.
22. Every retailer must have an objective way to measure the customer experience, because it is nearly impossible for him/her to be objective about it.
23. Always do what's best for the customer - unless you no longer want that customer.
24. Human beings are all fallible. That's why it is a manager's job to adhere to all loss prevention policies and procedures to keep the honest employees honest. The dishonest will eventually get caught. Some of my saddest times at work were terminating good people who made a bad choice.
25. Every time I'm told by a retailer "we have no competition" I always think "and you're delusional."
26. Criticizing someone you don't know and who has no impact on your life is a total waste of energy. Criticizing someone you know is a waste of good karma.
27. Innovation is important to most retailers' success only if it is built on a bedrock of a commitment to customers and employees.
28. I make an effort to learn something every single day. I know that combining the experience of the past with the knowledge gained today creates success.
29. Failing is important because if I never fail I'm not trying enough new things.
30. Failing is acceptable as long as it isn't from a lack of effort.
31. Don't miss the moment. As my wife says, keep your head where your feet are.
32. I once took a client only because I needed the business. Never again. Now I only take a client if I know they are likely to benefit from our working together.
33. Specialty retail is more about relationships than selling products.
34. Accept or change anything in your life that causes you problems or concerns but don't waste energy complaining about it.
35. The greatest gift you can give someone you don't know is a smile.
36. Ask for help when you need it. Offer to help when you don't.
37 Surround yourself with positive people who love life and love you. Don't listen to people who don't share the same values you do.
38. Never regret the past. Use it today to create a better tomorrow.
39. Don't underestimate the potential benefits of giving your employees a greater say in how your stores are run.
40. Prioritize your day and always put the customer first.
41. Whatever your title, if you're in a leadership role you always go first.
42. Passion trumps knowledge and skill. Never try to cover the lack of knowledge and skill with passion.
43. Never shy away from a difficult conversation with an employee, friend, or family member. You'll both be the better for it.
44. Be happy for others. Don't compare their lives to yours, identify with what they do or have done so you can do the same.
45. Always say, "thank you," "please," and "you're welcome." Expect the same from your staff and your children.
46. Sometimes bad things happen. It's one thing to be a victim; it's another to stay one.
47. No matter the cause, if I'm bent out of shape about something the problem is always within me. If I don't believe that I'm giving others the power to control me.
48. If you don't take the time to enjoy the rewards of your hard work, why work hard?
49. In my 20's I thought I knew everything. In my 30's I learned that I didn't. In my 40's I learned that I knew even less. Now that I'm 50 I'm looking forward to learning even more from others.
50 Love and value your friends and family. You never know when your time together will end.
51. Always go above and beyond for your customers, your staff, and your family.
I
spent my birthday on the beach at Martha's Vineyard. As I was looking
out over the ocean and contemplate turning 50, I cranked up Jimmy
Buffet's Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes and heard him sing these words,
Oh, yesterday's over my shoulder
So I can't look back for too long
There's just too much to see waiting in front of me
And I know that I just can't go wrong
With these changes in latitudes, changes in attitudes
Nothing remains quite the same
With all of my running and all of my cunning
If I couldn't laugh I just would go insane
If we couldn't laugh we just would go insane
If we weren't all crazy we would go insane
Clearly Jimmy is singing about us retailers!
- Doug
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