How NOT To Deliver a Memorable Retail Experience

Today in The Daily Retail Experience, our subscription daily newsletter, I shared with the readers “Five Tips To Delivering a Memorable Poor Experience”. It was a satirical way to demonstrate that it’s the small details that often makes or breaks a customer’s retail experience.

My favorite tip was #2 - Tell the customer everything you can about yourself even though it’s clear they’re not interested. If you’re going to be stuck at work being miserable you might as well take some hostages, right?  Just this week I met a saleswoman who holds a black belt in too much information.  In return for making one small purchase I was treated to her complete life story.  It’s amazing how many bad relationships that woman has had before the age of thirty.  I’m told that the key to success with this bad experience tactic is that the minute the customer starts to share details about herself you ring her up and send her on her way.  Who has time to listen to customers?

Obviously readers who want to deliver a memorable GREAT experience will not be inclined to follow these tips.  Whatever your experience goals, I hope you work for them with passion and a sense of purpose.

Comments

[Kathy Hooker]

Another way to NOT deliver a memorable experience is to visit a doctor's office. No, it's not retail, but it is service oriented. Before I die my wish is to take a doctor (or many doctors) and a nurse (or many nurses) and invite them in with a smile. Close the door AND THEN LEAVE THEM IN THE TINY ROOM with 3 year old boring magazines. Then I'll walk by the room so they can hear me talking and I'll turn the door knob but I won't go in. I'll walk away. When I'm looking at their test results I'll just have a blank expression on my face and say ........hhmmmm. Only after I scare the crap out of them, then I'll tell them that everything is fine. Oh and when I do have tests run I'll tell them that I will call with the results for which I really won't call. When they call me, I'll say "what tests". We never ordered that expensive $1400.00 C.A.T. scan. Oh, that one, that was a mistake. You were only supposed to get a chest x-ray.,...sorry :). Just had to rant. Thank you.

[Doug]

I love it. My doctor's office has about 40 horribly made signs about not using your cell phone in the office or showing up without an appointment. Of course it makes me want to show up unannounced and do a conference call from their office. I'm not sure why we have to have so many of these signs when one each is appropriate.

Of course I always go for the free Viagra Kleenexes. (Insert your own bad joke here.)

Thanks again Kathy.